How Writing Became My Passion

Like many, I had a difficult childhood, hardly any friends. I was the classic book worm, the geeky girl that no one noticed, except maybe for being the joke of the day. Some times even the teachers picked on me. Things like this became the norm and eventually who I was. Bad at sports and had no musical talent,so I turned to books. I know it can sound pretty pathetic, but I always preferred the company of a good book instead of trying to fit the stereotype of what my peers tried to impose as “in”.

I learned almost everything from books. One thing I was sure of , that there was nothing I wanted to learn from my environment. So I picked up some books and started to read. Believe it of not the first book that I read cover to cover was “The Divine Comedy” - by Dante Allegiery. I was 12 years old, I had to hide it underneath my mattress. I fell in love with the written word. Even the words that were alien to me, raised a curiosity that I still have today when I pick up a book.

I smile remembering how much of my work would be circulating at my school by the end of my freshman year. At any given time, ten or twelve papers on different kinds of subjects were being graded and winning competitions on the school grounds baring the name of other students, but written by me. By the time I was a Junior, I had a reputation as a ghost writer that reached two college campuses. At first, I was doing this for free. Later on, as the stakes rose and the complexity of the work increased in difficulty, desperate students would give me money for a personalized paper and a tutorial on how to present it. It made me fell important, and at the same time I could never claim ownership of anything. I was still alone. The goth nerdy girl, with ten different senior projects to choose from, with the guarantee to get an A.

Believe it or not, I never got caught, nor did the clients. I am not proud of it. But at the same time, it gives me a sense of accomplishment. Six poetry contests, 26 dissertations, 16 term papers, 12 thesis, 3 doctoral thesis before I graduated High School. ( one of them published) With a broken down typewriter and a note pad, living in the library. The only problem was to customize the papers to the style and personality of the student including their level of education and knowledge on the subject. I was still a weirdo, an outcast. I didn't care I was writing. And in essence no one knew it.

As the years progressed, so did my conditions. With each passing year, new challenges and new reasons to record what I have seen and gone through. About two years ago I was back in the hospital because of my heart. I asked a nurse for some paper and a pen so I could write a letter to my children. That letter was the catalyst I needed to write again.

It kept me from what was going on with my health and alleviates the stress of my situation. I write to bring a voice to those that, like me had something to say but no one listened. I don’t care about recognition, just the peace that writing brings to my soul.

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